The dancing five fingers

Daddy got bored and decided to show me his tap dancing fingers.

Now, who said I was Slow?

Moved

I've moved to http://iloveplaids.livejournal.com

Please update your links! Thanks!

A ray of light

Am very touched with the super kind and caring souls around me...

Got a call from Claudia this afternoon. This sweet girl has called to console and give me encouragement right after she saw my previous entry. Isn't that really sweet? Haha

In addition...

Xin, Christal and Linda made time to meet up with me for Minds on Tuesday! We played many different games and the girls definitely cheered me up! Too bad Linda had to go off in the evening, nevertheless the 3 of us still had great fun because it was ladies night!

I definitely recommend you peeps to go Minds on Tuesday because it is TOTALLY free! provided you dont order any drinks or food la.

We then went to Mac for our late dinner and to chat about school stuff... My dear girls, thank you for listening to me. I know its tiring to listen to a person whining about the same thing over and over again so I really appreciate you guys for being wonderful listening ears...

After that we continued our chat with some oversized Ice cream! Haha! It was then the 2 of them asked me how I wanna celebrate my birthday! At first I said I want to dress up and make up la, so that can take nice pics ma... then Xin suggested we should do something more sporty!

*grin* We have then decided we should go for a picnic cum cycling or blading session at ECP followed by feasting at Marina South! Hee! For my birthday celebration, we will have a chalet! Bwahahaha so last minute but I like the spontaneous side of us! Immediately booked a chalet at Downtown East! Next Monday! Super impromptu rite? *Mega smile*

So, I'm looking forward to all the meetings with my friends!

Monday - Chalet with Xin & Christal
Tuesday - Meetup with May & Pat
Wednesday - Picnic @ ECP
Thursday - Jurong Birdpark with the Love
Friday - Meetup with En
Saturday - Meetup with Eve, Jas & Yu
Sunday - BBQ @ home with family
Monday - Meeting in school (boohooo)


Yeah man, meeting in school on my actual day! Sian... Too bad my tuition friends will not be free to meet up. Oh, Shan too!!!


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Fuck the world

Cried my heart out totally last night.

Honestly, I cannot accept the fact that I cant get in especially when there are other friends who did not perform as well as I do in school got the offer.

Am I so fucking sway or what? I worked damn hard in this fucking school, I chiong my fucking way in my practicum school and got a fucking distinction.

But what happens? Some of my friends who leave on the dot at 1.30pm got the offer.

Was browsing some of the pics that I took with the NIE girlies while listening to some music. Was feeling damn emotional la. Lots of mixed feelings.

Firstly, I feel sad because I will not be able to experience the same thing with them because ALL of them got it except me.

Secondly, I think it will be more difficult for me to meet up with them to have crazy outings but they can still hang out together anytime in school or near school area, which I can't join them. Which further leads to the thought of drifting apart from my girlies. This is a freaking important factor for me because I cherish them as all my besties. What will I be without them?

Eve, Yu, Jas:
I really love you girls and I take the 3 of you as "my gang". When I tell my friends outside school I'm going out with my gang, they all know who you are. I don't know how to put things in words (because I'm not in the right mind now), but YOU ARE IMPORTANT TO ME.

Xin:
Thank you for being the sometimes-bimbotic-and-naive-but-sometimes-mature friend. I truly love your company and I cherish you as one of my besties in school too (out of that gang though). But I really cherish the friendship between us. The advices, the encouragements, the everything. Oh ya, You are the first bestie who have shared a fitting room with me and seen me in bra (ok, digress, but that represents how comfortable I am with you), not forgetting you are the only friend who has bunked over in my hall.

I know I am freaking stupid to make this sound like I'm migrating and leaving this whole damn world. In fact, fuck the world. *sigh* However, I do feel I am migrating to another world apart from you girls.

For all of you whom I have met in NIE, thank you for sharing a part of your life with mine.

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To Steph:

I'm not sure if you ever still read my blog. But I will do this anyway.
Yes, I did not forget you. I'm not trying to act like a fucking saint here, but yes, I still think of you sometimes. I was browsing through some pics we took last time and stumbled upon your birthday pics and video clips. I cried out loud too can? The fun times that the 5 of us shared before everything happened was unforgettable. I'm not trying to gain back friendships or whatsoever, I just do not like regret.

I hate the fact of not telling the person I love 'I love you'. That applies to friends too. The imagination (perhaps you already did it real-life) of you throwing away the photo frame that I did for you breaks my heart.

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Anyway, just to repeat myself, I love all of you people who have been part of my life. Thank you.

Opportunity?

I studied hard, I worked extremely hard, I got a good grade for Practicum, but I didn't get a letter.


Pathetic shit.


Especially when ALL my gfs around me got the offer. Sigh.

Never enough shoes!

Popped over to the Charles & Keith warehouse sale yesterday! Luckily we drove there quite early, didn't really have to queue! My singaporean-auntie-mode was turned on once we stepped into the warehouse (literally!).

The constant pushing and digging for heels and bags... yadda yadda... NEVERENDING! It's really the SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST! You strong, you push, you dig, you win! The ladies shoes are really cheap la... the most expensive range of shoes cost only $19! The rest cost about $15, $12, $5, and even $3 a pair (and buy 1 get 1 free!!!! which means $1.50 each pair) Can you imagine the craze of everyone with such rock bottom prices??? OMG!

I bought 4 pairs of goodies at only $19 each! hahahaha! The most expensive kinds la... leather pointed heels etc etc. I realise I'm REALLY getting old when I was taking pictures of the shoes I bought. They are so OL can... arghhhh


My favourite pair! (I'm a sucker for rounded pumps la)
Usual price: $39.90





Also my favourite pair! (Very soft leather, comfy!)
Usual price: $42.90





Black pointed heels
Usual price: $37.90





Denim girly heels
Usual price: $34.90







Yeah!!! Battle won!!! Bwahahahaha


Anyway, I've been contemplating for quite long whether to change my blog to wordpress or livejournal. I'm quite sick of not able to have private posts using blogspot... After eve's relocation and impressive advertisement of livejournal, I've been thinking hard if I wanna change... wordpress is quite similar also la, but i hate their frequent syntax errors!

Decision, decision, decision..........

Contradiction

I have such mixed feelings now... I ought to be happy now as everything is coming to an end and I finally have time to meet up with friends and relax yadda yadda....

I'm glad I got posted back to the same school (this means the relationships that I have built will definitely make me feel more at home since I will be back to a familiar ground). My CTs and former CTs are also very happy la that we can work together again... I love them a lot! Haha (cough, perhaps 1 or 2 exception la)

Hai...

I accompanied Dad and Mum to TTSH for Dad's checkup. This time is not for his accident injury thingy, but for the tumour. I have not told any of you except cabrina, simply because I really had no time to contact anyone during that period of time. Cab was around online, and my nick on MSN roused her to pop me a msg. Cab, thanks for caring. =) *hugz*

During March (my busiest weeks), the doctors found a lump in my Dad's liver. They deduced it is a benign one. It was reported that the tumour is approximately 2cm plus plus in size. My dad is extremely reluctant to undergo surgery as one of my uncles died at a very young age because he took the surgery and apparently the cancer cells spread to his whole body after the cut (all my uncles including Dad have Hep B, which increases the chance of getting liver cancer). So he told the Doc to give him 2 months time to see how things goes while he take TCM.

Yesterday, just 2 months later, we were shocked to hear from the doc that the tumour has almost doubled its size to 6cm plus plus. He says he will need to have a meeting with other doctors to finalise the procedures that Dad can take now. Surgery might not be suitable.

It hurts me so much to see Dad trying to be humourous and cheerful. I know he is afraid of losing us all, afraid of leaving us so early, afraid of leaving us all behind wondering if we can survive without him, afraid that we will live miserably simply because theres no more money coming in. In fact, I am fucking scared too. Nothing can describe the fear in me now. I have no idea how to help him except to find information online.

I am unable to feel happy for this whole practicum thing too. I am so troubled now that I cant even sleep. I don't know what to do now. I hope to urge Dad to undergo surgery, but even the doc now cannot confirm with us the success rate of the operation. How can we let Dad go under the knife just like that???

Now we will arrange another checkup with Raffles because we feel that there are limitations in a government hospital and perhaps a private one can offer more solutions. I really pray for the best.

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Dear heavenly Father,

Thank you for the tiring but smooth sailing and fulfilling practicum. Thank you for giving me strength to stay strong during that period of time and blessing me with the luck to receive a good grade.

Father, please bless my family with good health and strength to overcome this crisis. Especially my dad, lord please bless him with the optimism and guide him to make a correct decision. At this time when we are all weak, lord we commit ourselves to you and please guide us to the correct path to take.

Lord please grant all good things to be upon my dad. Please heal my dad. We hope the cancer cells will not spread and hopefully we can get rid of the tumour at that targetted area successfully and please let dad recover from this disease.

Not forgetting our friends and relatives, dear lord please bless them with good health and may all good things to be upon them. Please bless the other trainees to have a good start or to continue successfully in their careers.

All these we pray in Jesus's mighty name, Amen.